Motive[weight]

I haven't spoken of my struggle with weight on this blog (it'll happen eventually), but those of you who followed my old blog know it's been an ongoing issue for a while now. To sum it up, I gained a substantial amount of weight due to a few different health problems (some remain mysterious), and to say that losing it has been a challenge would be a colossal understatement.

In addition to the general joys weight gain brings - lack of fitness, loss of muscle, impaired balance - I have another concern that weighs on me (no pun intended): I own a small horse. Last I measured, Mexi was 15.2hh in front and about 15.3hh in back. With her petite posterior and my super sized one, this creates a bit of an issue.

My weight is definitely a very large reason (ha - again) that I haven't been riding her... in addition to other totally insane reasons like "I haven't ridden in 6 years and she's completely green". I currently have a number in my head for where I'd like myself to be, and I'm about 20-25lbs away from that. I will be there by spring, damnit!

 Anyway, in addition to not wanting to ride my midget mare, I've also lost a lot of motivation for riding in general. The desire is there, and it is SO strong, but the idea of shoving my butt into tight breeches, testing the absolute limits on the zippers of my half chaps, and fumbling around in my saddle like a Weeble? Not so appealing.

This is merely a mind game, however, and one I need to win. I need to get back in the saddle, not just because it can contribute, in whatever small part, to my overall fitness... but also because I really need to get reacquainted with my old riding self.

The winter weather may be a blessing in disguise. For the most part, it keeps us hacking in the fields instead of schooling in the ring. I had forgotten just how great it is to get out and ride in a field, but I was happily reminded yesterday.

A girl who may be leasing one of Kevin's horses came out to try them, and Kevin asked me to take her for a hack. I rode Olivia, and let me tell you... it was a blast. We went in the front field and just walked for the most part, with some trots and canters thrown in. And it was FUN. Really, really fun.

Olivia
Sweetest face

It was like a combination between a big slap in the face and a huge surge of motivation. I love to ride. I really, really love to ride. While my desire to ride never lessened, I think I let myself forget how much I thoroughly enjoy it - regardless of what size my breeches are. I had a blast yesterday, and I never once felt hindered by my weight.

Since my ride on Sunday, I've made plans to go for a hack tomorrow with K, to go for a hack after school on Friday with E (girl trying the horse), and I hope to get up either Saturday morning or sometime Sunday. I'd love to go both days, but I'm not sure if it's in the gas budget.

Moral of the story: just hop on a horse, find a field, and RIDE. The rest will come naturally.